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iT LAD

Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350

Wife

My wife has been missing a week now.

Police have told me to prepare for the worst. So i have been to the charity shop to get all her clothes back...

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Paddy strikes lucky in a club, this girl invites him back 2 her place where they enjoyed some fun on the sofa in her living room.

A few minutes into it, she says 'Let's take this upstairs' 'OK' he replied, 'U grab one end and i'll grab the other'.

18th Nov 2010 9:21am

Fox

Member Since: 02 Apr 2010
Location: Essex
Posts: 2313

Most people get married before the wife jokes start.

18th Nov 2010 9:53am

iT LAD

Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350

I'm starting early...

18th Nov 2010 10:34am

JOKER

Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876

I got a new stick deodorant today.
The instructions said: Remove cap and push up bottom.

I can barely walk, but whenever I fart the room smells lovely.

18th Nov 2010 2:43pm

Royle

Member Since: 12 Nov 2010
Location: Perth
Posts: 655

Why you got a stick deodrant anyway? Aren't they for lasses.

18th Nov 2010 2:50pm

JOKER

Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876

Your thinking of Vibrators ........

18th Nov 2010 2:53pm

Royle

Member Since: 12 Nov 2010
Location: Perth
Posts: 655

Eh, no. I can't be arsed to explain.

18th Nov 2010 2:59pm

JOKER

Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876

18th Nov 2010 3:00pm

JOKER

Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876

The Wife is starting a new modelling job next week ..............

She's the before model ..........

20th Nov 2010 8:51pm

iT LAD

Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350

My wife and I were happy for twenty years.

Then we met.

22nd Nov 2010 5:56pm

47p2

Member Since: 05 Oct 2010
Location: Gone Beyond, Subaru
Posts: 8048

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

22nd Nov 2010 5:58pm

47p2

Member Since: 05 Oct 2010
Location: Gone Beyond, Subaru
Posts: 8048

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late.

22nd Nov 2010 6:01pm

iT LAD

Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350

47p2 wrote:
I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

22nd Nov 2010 6:12pm

47p2

Member Since: 05 Oct 2010
Location: Gone Beyond, Subaru
Posts: 8048

It's been reported that a new craze in Britain has started where men drink spirits from their girlfriends fannys using a straw. The government fears a rise in minge drinking!!!!

22nd Nov 2010 7:29pm

SteveMFr
Site Sponsor

Member Since: 22 Nov 2009
Location: Strasbourg, France
Posts: 1641

And one for IT Lad as the groom to be:
The secret to a good marriage - remains a secret.
RRC 2Dr, RRC 4Dr,
P38, and 2 L322s
(wife thinks I'm nuts - prob right, too)

22nd Nov 2010 7:58pm

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